The CH Turkey Bowl

Well Turkey Bowling fans, it's time at last! Put down yourpencils, stow away your stat sheets and tune in, because the long months of thepreseason have finally ended. That's right, it's game time, baby. It's a beautiful,sunny day here at the CollegeHumor Arena in downtown New York City, where the2009 Turkey Bowling season will begin and end in a few spectacular minutes ofultimate athleticism.

Among the Bowlers mighty enough to come this far, who will emerge as the champion? Will it be Streeter Seidell, the seemingly indomnitable titan whosehistoric quest for the title has brought a new level of excitement to thesport? Will it be Pat Cassels, whose Cindarella season has inspired millions offans? Or will it be Miracle, the hilarious turkey-bowling dog?

See if your pick to win actually did!


And check out the professional turkey bowlers who startedthe trend and inspired us all on 10 ITEMS OR LESS. All-new episodes starttonight at 11/10c on TBS.

Noah Everyday

With a new year starting we felt it was only appropriate to post a Web Celeb who deals with the passing of time. Thus we give you Noah Kalina's rad "Everyday" video where he mashes up a picture of himself a day for something like 6 years. FACT: Noah is a photographer and takes most of the model shots for our T-Shirt company, BustedTees. So every time you see some cute girl in one of our T-Shirts in a banner ad, you can thank this man.

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More Cyanide and Happiness at Explosm.net

Thrill of Victory, Agony of... Delayed Victory

Missouri fans react to a field goal they thought would win the game, but ultimately missed. (Missouri ended up winning in overtime, but it's still fun to watch these ladies experience a complete range of emotions in .3 seconds)

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Dear Mr. Peever,

Thank you very much for your letters. The Discovery Channel welcomes all types of feedback from its dedicated fans and seriously considers all recommendations. However, at this time we are unfortunately not able to honour your numerous requests and will not be expanding our famous Shark Week.

While the prospects of "Shark Month" and "Shark Semester" are enticing, we still feel that well-rounded and informative programming is more conducive to our mission. Your subsequent request of a "Shark Fortnight" was an improvement, but we're still confident that one week out of the year devoted entirely to sharks is enough.

It's been far too long since your last confession and there's been a lot of good, solid sinning going on across the country. Check out the top 5 and don't forget to submit your misdeeds here!

Hey man, remember those two weeks during spring semester when your mom's house got foreclosed and she had to stay with us? Every time the two of you were gone, I'd rummage through her hamper and smell her panties. In all seriousness dude, your mom is smokin' hot.

James Carter, University of Minnesota

I went to a Jewish law school, and every October we had crazy days off for Jewish holidays. One year we lucked out with 3 consecutive weeks off, so a bunch of us decided to take a cruise. One of the guys who decided to invite himself along was just a straight-up douchebag... one of those people who argues just for the sake of arguing, is always trying to prove someone wrong, just an arrogant son of a bitch. He wasn't really anyone's friend, and by day 3 of the 7-day cruise, everyone (and not just the law school ppl) was fed up with him. A bunch of us were sitting around that night and someone made a comment that they wished this a-hole would get lost on the island tomorrow and not make it back to the ship. We all sort of looked at each other and had an "aha!" moment. Every night, the ship staff slipped itinerary under our doors about the next day's location: weather, things to see, and most importantly, when the ship was leaving port. And we all know that if you miss the boat, you're shit outta luck and have to find your own way to the next port of call. So the plan was casually work the wrong departure time into the conversation the next morning and keep repeating it. As everyone showed up to breakfast one by one, we made a point of saying that the time changed from 5:00 to 6:00. Knowing he was sunburned and couldn't stay out in the sun, we told him we were spending the day at the beach. He came with us, but after 3 hours of watching us swim and play volleyball, he headed back into town. We reminded him to be back by 6 and let him go on his merry way. Long story short, he had to pay his own way from the British Virgin Islands to Antigua and meet the ship there the next day. When he asked how we all made it back on time, we told him we got bored at the beach and went back early and just assumed we'd see him later. He never mentioned it, but we all think he found out that we messed with him, but was too arrogant to call us on it for fear of being wrong. Douchebag.
Dorian F, A Jewish Law School

Turkey Bowling

What is turkey bowling?Why are we writing about it?No?FINE! I'll tell you.Turkey bowling is a "sport" practiced by bored grocery store employees in their off hours.Imagine bowling but instead of a ball you use a frozen turkey and instead of pins you use 2 liter soda bottles.If your grocery store is particularly cool they might even set up blacklights and have a Galactic Turkey Bowling night.Turkey Bowling is so popular that the leader of the free world - for a few more days, at least - took a shot at it back when he was on the campaign trail.President Bush bowled an impressive 9.

The folks over at "10 Items or Less" dared the CH staff to Turkey Bowl and try to beat GWB's score.We were all amazing at it, obviously, but only one of us stood above the rest.So I ask you this, who do you think won?

The Athletes
  • Jake
  • Sarah
  • Amir
  • Streeter
  • Dan
  • Pat
  • Jeff
We'll pick a random commenter who guesses correctly and send them a MyStErY PrIzE!!!1!

Mason Crosby 69 yard attempt

You see, when a team fair catches a punt or kick, they can take a free kick for a field goal. The Packers let Mason Crosby go for an NFL record (previously 63) because they were playing the Lions, and frankly, the crowd needed something to get excited about. Who are we to blame them?!

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