Jake Hurwitz's Articles

5 total in July 2008

  • It's Called...

    So you may remember when CollegeHumor held a vote to decide whether that game you college kids play is called Beer Pong or Beirut. But we all know that vote hardly settles anything. We know you're set in your ways, and no stupid ass democratic vote is going to change your mind. So that's why BustedTees has made two new t-shirts, one for each school of thought.

    Now you can wear your shirt of choice proudly, and stubbornly. Because the guy in the other shirt is wrong. And gay. Very, very gay.

    So what shirt will you wear?



    Or


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  • We Need Interns!

    Our Summer interns are huge nerds and they wanna go back to SCHOOL soon. God what losers. Anyway, we can't dwell on what big dorks this current group of dweebs are. I'm writing to ask for your help. We need Fall semester interns. Here are our requirements:

    • A good sense of humor.
    • Familiar with CollegeHumor and other comedy websites.
    • Familiar with computers/the internet.
    • Up to date on pop culture.
    • Willing to learn and work with a team!
    • Live in, or within commuting distance of Manhattan. (NYC)
    • Not a loser.

    And here are the kinds of things we'd have you do.


    • Help sorting and posting videos.
    • Write articles.
    • Upkeep the site, i.e. edit columns, caption pictures etc...
    • Brainstorm general ideas for the site, videos and BustedTees.

    And all you have to do to apply is send a cover letter and resume to YesIWillWorkForFree@gmail.com. And please, remember not to swear at me in your cover letter. That's not how you get a job, even here.
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  • The Weekly WYR

    July 17th

    by Jake Hurwitz July 17, 2008


    It's my favorite time of the week, it's time for the Weekly WYR. See if you're brave enough to choose a side in what surely are the universe's most difficult quagmires. And remember, if you've got a great WYR, submit it at the bottom of this or any WYR article.

    Would You Rather...

    • Have your town over run by zombies, or fat girls with high self esteem? From KY
    • Have popcorn kernels stuck in the back of your mouth, or have a fly keep landing on your when youre trying to fall asleep? From Kyle
    • Burn the roof of your mouth eating hot food, or have all your fingernails clipped too short? From Kyle
    • Go back in time and chang something in your past, or Go to the future and see what your life is like? From Jared
    • Have the monster from Cloverfield trying to kill you, or Javier Bardem from No Country for Old Men? From Matt
    • Be best in the world at one thing, or 10th best in the world at 10 things? From Brian
    • Have infinate amounts of okay pizza, or have a set amount of the best pizza in the world? From Mike
    • Have your life depend on getting a swirled random password in one try, or figure out a magic eye in one try? From Neil
    • Be a cute polar bear with an amputated leg, or a cute kitten that is bald due to a deathly illness? From vic
    • Personally end strife in Darfur, or see The Dark Knight? From Andrew

    Finally, this week's winner of the I Don't Think You're Getting Enough Sleep Award is Julia, who sent in this.

    • Not be able to understand the concept of "more" or only be able to speak in iambic pentameter? From Julia

    Congrats Julia, now please get some rest.

    If you have a good WYR, submit it here.
    Check back every Friday to see if yours made the cut.

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  • Wall-E Concept Art: The Deleted Scenes

    Wall-E has a not so cute proposal for Eve.

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  • The Weekly WYR

    July 10th

    by Jake Hurwitz July 10, 2008


    It's my favorite time of the week, it's time for the Weekly WYR. See if you're brave enough to choose a side in what surely are the universe's most difficult quagmires. And remember, if you've got a great WYR, submit it at the bottom of this or any WYR article.

    Would You Rather...

    • Get paid tons of money to watch Water World 5 times a day, or get paid a modest amount for doing something fun? From Derek
    • Have sex with a girl only to find out you're closely related, or get a blowjob from a girl only to find out she's a man? From Mike
    • Have a billion dollars but only be able to spend money once a year, or have a million dollars to spend whenever? From Kyle
    • Build an awesome fort, or build a badass tree house? From Joe
    • Ride a Panda Bear, or be friends with a silly Monkey? From Ryan
    • Live the happiest life ever, but with guarenteed admission to Hell, or live the unhappiest life ever, with admission to Heaven? From Steve
    • Have Carlos Mencia perform at your wedding, or have Carlos Mencia strip at your bachelor party? From Matt
    • Be the person that invented the spork, or the person that invented those corn holding things? (with the 2 prongs) From Francis

    Finally, this week's winner of the Let's Go The Connecticut Sun! Award is Matt, who sent in this.

    • Find five bucks on the ground or have your local WNBA team win the championship? From Matt

    Come on, Matt, these ladies rule!

    If you have a good WYR, submit it here.
    Check back every Friday to see if yours made the cut.

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    • Jake Hurwitz Hunter College

    About Me

    Jake Hurwitz felt really bad about deleting his old bio. He was feeling pretty nostalgic because his mom helped him write it. I love you Mom!

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