"I am away from my computer right now" - Too stupid to figure out how to set an away message, or too lazy to tell people what you're up to (which is the whole point of AIM)

"ltr mch" - what the fuck does this mean? Last week it was "lbr slp plt." These are the same people who write "byee" and "nyce" and "shyt." Get over yourself.

"I love you, I want you to hold me..." - This person always has some lovesick lyrics ready to express how they're feeling. Probably a cutter. Stay away, and DO NOT, under any circumstances, HAVE A RELATIONSHIP with this person. Underneath their sweet persona, they are completely psychotic.

"fuck the world" - Well, the world doesn't want your whining ass anyway.

"class - library - study hall - class - dinner - homework - sleep" - While it's nice that you're willing to outline your entire day, at this point it's kind of desperate. The only reason to give this much information is if you think you might go missing halfway through the day, and want investigators to know where you were all day. Other than that, a simple "out" would have sufficed.

"Over at (frat)..." 4 hours later... "I don't want to talk about it." - This just isn't fair. It's like the "Yada Yada Yada" Seinfeld episode. People who leave the "I don't want to talk about it" secretly do, and are expectantly waiting for your IM asking them what happened. Don't give them the satisfaction.